We all need boundaries in order to have healthy relationships at work and at home. The good news about setting boundaries is they can strengthen relationships and improve self-esteem. The challenge when establishing boundaries is articulating what you want and how you want your boundaries to be honored.
Our changing culture is introducing new ideas and new ways of doing things that challenge our preconceived impressions about the way things are, including our versions of Our Stories. Peek observed, “Our Stories weigh a ton.” They make us less adaptable to a changing world.
Letting go of burdens from our past is an effective step toward embracing change. Instead of focusing on Our Story, we should be open to the future as a collection of ideas. We can view ourselves as everchanging, maturing individuals whose perceptions are in continual development.
By almost any measure, our standard of living is higher than most places on earth, yet our material success often leaves us feeling more alone and unsatisfied, in some cases even clinically depressed. Smith declares that “this despair is not a lack of happiness. It’s a lack of something else, it’s a lack of having meaning in life.”
“When we focus our attention on ourselves, we evaluate and compare our current behavior to our internal standards and values. We become self-conscious as objective evaluators of ourselves.”- Shelley Duval, Robert Wicklund
One of the first steps in developing our emotional intelligence is recognizing our emotions, and the effects they have on others. We can and should make an effort to objectively recognize our emotions so we can monitor and modify how we behave in particular situations. But that is easier said than done.
We all have an internal map that guides our behavior. Our internal map, or paradigm, is developed over the course of our lifetime. Our paradigm influences our choices and reactions to circumstances and events we experience on a daily basis.
Becoming aware that we operate from our paradigm is a huge step in self-understanding.
To change your behavior you have to become aware of your negative patterns and what rewards you may be getting from them. Once you’re aware, you can set up strategies to facilitate new behaviors to replace the old patterns. Participating in group seminars on Emotional Intelligence can provide the tools for rapid and lasting paradigm shifts.
What do you do when you find yourself cornered by an energy Vampire? Garlic repels everyone, even the people you like and to be frank, who wouldn’t a stake through the heart kill… That solution is inadvisable at best. Being subjected to the routine energy sucking behavior of an energy vampire is, well, draining!
Emotional intelligence is the “something” in each of us that is a bit intangible. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions to achieve positive results.
Despite the significance of EQ, its intangible nature makes it very difficult to know how much you have and what you can do to improve if you’re lacking.
Here are 15 of the characteristics people with high EQ possess:
Emotional Intelligence is not about sitting in a lotus position or hugging everyone you meet. Really emotionally intelligent leaders are balanced, gracious and dynamic. They share their passion, and support those around them. Fostering good EQ is crucial for team success… and it doesn’t hurt in 1:1 relationships either! Here are 6 characteristics emotionally intelligent leaders possess...
Over time, listening openly and attentively to others helps to cultivate trust. Reflect on your experiences: The more connected you feel to someone, the more you tend to trust that person, and the easier it becomes to talk. This contributes to a sense of psychological safety, which according to a Google study is the key to successful teams. The ability to take risks and speak up can be the difference between thwarting a mistake or learning from one. In the end, everyone benefits.
Personal development is about investing in yourself so that you can manage yourself effectively regardless of what life might bring your way.
Personal development allows you to be proactive. Rather than wait for good things to happen, you get out there and make them happen.
You may not always achieve your objective, but you will experience a richer and more rewarding life when you commit to pursuing your own objectives. Making that commitment to personal development is the first step on the path to personal fulfillment.
#1 Letting the Opinions of Others Control Your Life
- It’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts.
- You have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else.
#2 The Shame of Past Failures
- Your past does not equal your future.
- All that matters is what you do right now.